Bah Humbugs They Are
Hmph.
While I enjoy receiving, and I really do, if I had to choose, I'd rather give than receive. I'm just that kind of girl. A pleaser, if you will. I like to make people happy.
(Gift giving and receiving.... although I guess that could be a gift. Do they have gift cards for that? I'm sure they do.)
So I gave my entire staff gift bags of candy and Christmas cards thanking them for their hard work. Each person got a gift card for a store tailored to their wants and needs, and an extra gift so there was something to actually unwrap, not just a piece of plastic money.
What were they most excited about? The candy.
How many people said thank you? All of them.
How many people said it like they meant it and were touched that I put so much thought, time and yes, money, into their gifts? Two. Maybe three.
How much did that make me feel kinda blah and unappreciated. Very.
I like people to be enthusiastic. I like them to appreciate kind thoughts and actions. I don't like them to expect gifts. And I don't like them to feel they are entitled to gifts. I shouldn't have to bribe people to do their jobs. While I want to thank them for their work, it isn't part of the pay package.
And this goes for my unthankful, thoughtless, stingy sister as well. Not that she reads this. I use dirty words and suggestive phrasing and read Harry Potter. Clearly, I'm unclean.
posted by Vicarious Living @ 9:31 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
Welcome to the leper colony, Cindy. I'll be your hostess for todays orientation, after that- you're on your own.....unless you can think of some really cool NEW ways for me to get in trouble. We DO have a sorority, you know.
;-)
I agree completely. I HATE when people are ungrateful. Especially if I take the time to get them a gift. I don't just throw crap together. Most of the stuff I give I make myself (gift baskets). So when I don't get a thank you or at the very least, a smile, I get very T-d off. The saying "It's the thought that counts," is a two way street. So when you receive a gift from somebody your 'thoughtlessness' shows up big time when you fail to thank the giver. Some people don't do it on purpose, they just have a lot on their mind, but others are just ungrateful crabs who deserve lumps of coals.
Can you tell I'm in a mood this morning?
Tanya
And you LIVE IN SIN WITH A MAN.
That's the clincher.
This is only going on hearsay, hunches, and whatnot, but maybe it's because you're their boss.
Sometimes it's really hard to bridge that gap between management and.. well.. not management.
I hate to get all Machiavellian, but you need to be respected as their boss, and a lot of the time that respect comes with friendship and feelings taking the fall.
While the "golden rule" certainly should be in place for them to do unto others what they would have done unto them, your situation reminds me of another golden rule.. (the silver rule?)
Sometimes referred to as the 2 out of 3 rule.. it applies to the production of just about anything, which is: you can have it good, you can have it fast, you can have it cheap. Pick any two.
With a little tweaking for your situation... we get: you can have them like you, you can have them respect you, you can keep your sanity. Pick any two.
Or, perhaps you should just refer to the mockumentary "Fear of a Black Hat" where writer/director/actor Rusty Cundieff's anagram-obsessed rapper Ice Cold says, "FYM. F*ck Y'all Muh'F*ckas."
When you raise to a staus of employer, that's what happens. Now, if you had given them the gift as a friend in a bar having drinks--no problems.
I think I brought in donuts/candy/cookies/pizza or something for my students. ONCE. Yes, the motherf*ckers. Totally snubbed my food and still acted like a bunch of b*tching-hoe-b*stards.
I get more respect by piling an unhealthy amount of work on them, then occasionally backing off.
And yes. It's because you are a woman and you have been socialized to accomodate.
Great--thanks alot Cindi! I have guests coming over in less than 3 hours! I'm going to bite their friggin heads off and shove 'em up their arses--THEY AIN'T GETTING NOTHING FROM THIS HOE BAG--I'M DONE WITH THIS SH*T! NO ONE APPRECIATES A D*MN THING WE DO--WE NEED TO SEPRATE AND START OUR OWN COLONY (JUST LET GUYS IN TO SERVE US WITH SEX IF WE LIKE & no ungrateful b*tches allowed).
ehem. I'm ok. I'm ok.
lepers indeed. we could rule this planet if we wanted to.
I*'m just surprised that yout hought to give your staff such thoughtful gifts!
What did my old boss get us for Christmas?
Free pizza...3 pizzas between 25 or us.
That half sice of cold, plain cheese pizza really put me in the christmas mood.
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