This Was SO Not In The Job Description

My job is a lovely mix of paper-pushing and manual labor. I can sling 50 lb boxes around like it's just a warm up for the main event, and then spend 3 hours "discussing" the bill of lading for said boxes. And I won't even get into the customer service aspect. That's for another post after much quality time with Mr. Cuervo. I'm thinking I should really pay him a visit.

It was one of those days, and since I didn't get home until after 2:00 am, I think I can safely say it was also one of those nights. There are many tactics I use to deal with stress at work. Office Yoga. Deep breathing exercises. Chocolate. Very involved daydreams of winning lottery tickets and cabana boys at my service.

While covered in dust and dirt, sweating and cursing as myself and 2 coworkers tried in true sitcom fashion to piece together a shelving unit, a unit that clearly had never been put together by another human being ever before, I tried a new tactic.
I remembered that it could always be worse, and in fact, has.

I had a pretty comfy first job. No drive-thru speaker box or supermarket checker for me. I worked in a library. Yes, life was rough, what with the air conditioning and books and all that. At first I worked for free as a volunteer earning school credit, then I became a full-fledged city employee, complete with a forced retirement fund, which was a little unnerving at 16.

But no job is without it's downside.
Here is a small sampling of issues your local Library Clerk may be dealing with:

* Transients who think the fake potted palm in the Quiet Reading Area is a urinal.
* Patrons who think the outside Book Drop is a trash can, throwing their used condoms, dirty diapers and molding tupperware inside.
* Parents who mistaken the Children's Department for a day care and leave their 3 year old unattended for several hours, resulting in calls to the Police and Department of Children and Families.
* Perverts who believe jerking off on the back of unsuspecting patrons is an acceptable alternative to a pickup line.

But at least it was quiet.