My Mom Says I'm a Catch
I've been receiving a significantly larger number of cell phone calls this month than usual. Anyone scrolling through my call log might mistaken me for someone with an active nightlife.
Or a drug dealer. Maybe a hooker.
Many are Restricted, several are long distance, yet surprisingly most are actually for me, as opposed to the calls I get at home.
To what do I owe this sudden increase in popularity? Is my name and number crudely scratched into a bathroom stall door somewhere? Did Costco betray my trust and sell my number to a third party after all? Are my other personalities playing phone tag?
Possibly, likely, and we'll never tell.
In a fit of job dissatisfaction, I posted my resume on Monster. And then promptly forgot about it. Apparently my craftily constructed, corporate-speak clogged entry has attracted the attention of varied employers. Soon I could be blogging about any one of these exciting new occupations:
Accidental Insurance Rep
Build-A-Bear Foundation Bear
Fabric and Rug Sales Consultant
Loss Prevention Auditor Trainee
Office Manager for Fish Market
Bank Reconciliation Clerk
Traveling Reset Merchandise Manager
The winner for most calls in a week? Home Depot. They really want me, and several different reps have rattled off a variety of jobs I would be ideally suited for:
Garden Department Manager! Door Installation! Paint Analysis!
Um.... I mentioned nothing about "This Old House" on my resume.
I may have to call the Fish Market one back; wouldn't you?
posted by Vicarious Living @ 12:51 AM
7 comments
7 Comments:
For Home Depot:
Three important rules for breaking up
Don’t put off breaking up when you know you want to
Prolonging the situation only makes it worse
Tell him honestly, simply, kindly, but firmly
Don’t make a big production
Don’t make up an elaborate story
This will help you avoid a big tear jerking scene
If you wanna date other people say so
Be prepared for the boy to feel hurt and rejected
Even if you’ve gone together for only a short time,
And haven’t been too serious,
There’s still a feeling of rejection
When someone says she preferres the company of others
To your exclusive company,
But if you’re honest, and direct,
And avoid making a flowery emotional speech when you brake the news,
The boy will respect you for your frankness,
And honestly he’ll apeciate the kind of straight foward manner
In which you told him your decision
Unless he’s a real jerk or a cry baby you will remain friends
~Nada Surf
Where is that "Buzz Bin" cd anyway?
Fish market, definitely. I know every little girl dreams of being a Fish Monger one day.
Yup, I'd go for the fish job as well.
Nothing lie the smell of fish to make you bounce to work in the morning!
PS If you get the job, can you take my aquarium in and make hints about what happens to mischevious fish?
Oh, Cindy,
You poor dear. But it could be worse. They could be telemarketers. LOL!
Hugs,
Tanya
I don't think I know anyone that is 100% satisfied with the job they work at. I think it's the plague of our generation. We don't have anything else to worry about anymore, so we worry about boredom.
Nahh, I can safely tell you it is not generational. It is a fact of life. If one is dissatified, then they're supposed to move along and go on to better or bigger things. Work will always have its quirks.
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