tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-115711772011-04-21T12:33:47.388-07:00Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.comBlogger2131100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-17951497059327513462007-09-08T12:43:00.000-07:002007-09-08T13:04:36.187-07:00

Why don't hotels feel it worthwhile to include pictures of bathrooms in their online photo galleries? I find it very frustrating to search through a hotel's photos and not be able to find an example of the surfaces I will be placing parts of my naked body. It is important to know if there's a tub or a walk-in shower. If there is a sink outside the bathroom as well as in. If there is room to

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-36745653827112115072007-08-29T19:24:00.001-07:002007-08-29T19:43:54.007-07:00

I miss California.Dooce is blogging about LA, damn her, and with the heat, the humidity and all the other woe-is-me going on, it's enough to make me forget all the reasons we decided to move in the first place.But it could just be the Sudafed PE talking - working with the public makes me sick.We're planning a CA visit for April 2008, money permitting of course. Once I crunched the numbers, I

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-64712185263881220842007-08-13T22:13:00.000-07:002007-08-13T21:59:16.306-07:00

Let's face it, any place as hot, humid and overgrown as Florida will spawn all manner of expletive-worthy creepy crawlies. After (cough) years as a resident, I'm still not accustomed to the bird-sized mosquitoes you nickname as they feast, the palmetto bugs that show off their 4 ft wingspan as you approach.However, I've managed to abide by the Usurper Treaty of Long Long Ago, protecting myself

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-74094520593002352112007-08-10T17:39:00.000-07:002007-08-11T07:23:56.884-07:00

Dear Blogger,Thank you for remembering me, when apparently I could not even remember myself. Nor my password. Or the email address I used to set up this account. Thank you for blog-sitting all these many months. You even sprayed for spam! What a doll. The time away has made me appreciate you and the service, the outlet you provide, even more.Unfortunately, I cannot lay any claim to the betterment

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1163123107936656932006-11-09T17:42:00.000-08:002006-11-09T17:45:07.973-08:00

As if you couldn't tell.Only one of us at a time, so I fully expected everyone else to keep to their regular updating schedule.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1158377466569076682006-09-15T20:28:00.000-07:002007-08-10T17:21:44.813-07:00

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1157599407401877462006-09-06T20:14:00.000-07:002006-09-06T20:23:27.426-07:00

start rantI cannot take one more fucking thing being outsourced to India or another country where the primary language is not ENGLISH. If I cannot understand what the person handling my customer service question is telling me, then you are NOT meeting my needs, the needs of the customer. This ESPECIALLY applies to my banking, stocks, credit cards, or anything else of a financial manner.end rant

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1155955256956717622006-08-19T08:23:00.000-07:002006-08-18T19:47:18.396-07:00

As of 10:26 am, I will have successfully completed 26 years.I want to get back into the blogging habit, but am considering a change of scenery. I don't plan on closing up shop here completely, just extending the apparent impromptu vacation I have taken. Once I settle in, we'll have an open house.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1154012703605622802006-07-21T07:36:00.000-07:002006-07-27T08:25:55.496-07:00

Dear Diary,I'm so sorry I haven't written lately.Lina is still a pretty, if not perfect, kitty, and I'm happy to have her in the house!Work is very tiring.I seem to be spending a lot of energy doing a lot of nothing!It's so hard being the new girl. Ugh.I'm 'training', but all they do is give me busy work so they can either mess around or do something more important. How is a person supposed to

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1152373018449781442006-07-08T08:19:00.000-07:002006-07-08T08:41:36.320-07:00

Catalina New Queen of the House

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1152142813205653792006-07-05T16:34:00.000-07:002006-07-05T19:32:57.163-07:00

Not only do I want a VW Rabbit now, but I just purchased Patrick and Eugene's "The Birds and The Bees" from iTunes. It's cute and clever! The commercial and the song. I know the Rabbit has an identity problem, but now it's got the cute little emblem on it again. (Ok, I wouldn't really buy a car based on such trivial motivations....)I also downloaded KC and The Sunshine Band's "Boogie Shoes"

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1152023892920620192006-07-04T07:24:00.000-07:002006-07-04T07:39:19.696-07:00

The Night I Painted The SkyJimmy Buffett, Russ Kunkel, Jay Oliver, Roger Guth, and Peter MayerVerseI CAME FROM THE NORTH ESCAPING CONVENTIONTHE MODERN INVENTION THAT WON'T LET ME BE TO THE SHORES OF ST. MAARTEN WITH MY FICTION ADDICTIONTO RESTART THE FIRE A DREAMER'S REMEDY VerseINDEPENDENCE DAY AND ALL I REMEMBERWAS A MIDNIGHT RAINBOW THAT FELL FROM THE SKYAS I STAND ON THE BEACH I SLOWLY

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1151111743908174202006-06-23T18:09:00.000-07:002006-06-24T09:43:25.533-07:00

Everyone should know a lawyer. And a mechanic. Wouldn't hurt to have a plumber in the family either.Each generation should have a family ceremony where the newest parents pull occupations out of Tupperware and promise to produce a doctor, dentist, electrician, whatever requirement their children won in the lottery."You know my sister is going to get the oncologist and our little Jenny is going to

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1150345860619743442006-06-14T21:26:00.000-07:002006-06-14T21:56:26.236-07:00

I see this billboard everyday now. Any theories?

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1150156820130306502006-06-12T16:48:00.000-07:002006-06-12T20:58:26.410-07:00

Yes, it was on YouTube and Today and I'm sure I missed a post one of you guys did which started a great dialogue in the comments section, but the first I heard about this was in an email. Finally, a fwd worth opening. My concern now is the amount of money I'll spend on iTunes tonight, downloading songs I'll have to turn off at every toll booth.Like a high school dance without the crepe paper,

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1149990620196933652006-06-10T18:16:00.000-07:002006-06-10T19:01:42.813-07:00

Tropical Depression #1Lovely.30 days and we are so gone!Well, you can't really be out of the projected path unless you leave the state and it's neighbors entirely, but I'll take the upper middle.And it only cost us an extra $1000 to do it.Damn lease agreements.Damn corporate real estate departments.The To-Do ListStorage RentalMover EstimatesTruck Rental ReserveClose Out New Job #1Fill out

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1149801679674781232006-06-08T14:09:00.000-07:002006-06-08T14:21:19.736-07:00

Twelve hours should be plenty of time to recharge the batteries, even during a stressful week. Dreams may be the mind's way of entertaining you or processing information and images. It's like your brain needs to catch up on some work, so it does a little overtime. Apparently mine was very far behind and had to pull an all-nighter. Can't say I blame it; there's a lot going on (again) and too many

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1149178141939844022006-06-01T16:31:00.000-07:002006-06-01T14:01:06.060-07:00

Batwoman is a lesbian socialite!As I've said before, I do not know much about the world of comics, but I hope DC does this right. Introducing diverse characters to another area of mainstream entertainment could have positive social influences. (I'm not aware of comics being well-populated with gays and lesbians in the past.) It's already causing debate, and will hopefully prove encouraging.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1149035810478334222006-05-31T22:28:00.000-07:002006-05-31T19:54:57.036-07:00

I've seen many dirty, even X-rated t-shirts. Most of them were funny and didn't bother me at all. Today however, I saw a man walking through a store wearing a t-shirt with an 11x14 image of a naked woman giving a naked man a blow job.And no one said a word. No one batted an eye.While walking down aisle 12, a photo-transferred image of a woman's naked ass passed within 6 inches of my face, and no

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1148920388301211262006-05-30T20:19:00.000-07:002006-05-30T17:42:21.460-07:00

Meeting a new boss for the first time is a little unsettling. Sure, he interviewed you over the phone, and you've exchanged a few emails, but this is the first face-to-face meeting, and you want to make a good impression.Basically, it's like a blind date. A forced set-up.Especially if you find yourselves sitting at a table with low-lighting after the lunch rush of a local restaurant.You talk

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1148916058878438802006-05-29T08:13:00.000-07:002006-05-29T09:12:40.516-07:00

The Great Apartment Search is on again.To avoid exposing you all to negative energy, I will refrain from posting my hostile thoughts on the subject.However, in disbelief after a few fruitless hours on the main apartment search sites, I tried typing in random rental keywords into Google. Instead of FL apartments, I found this guy's site. Maybe he's a big shot a lot of people know about, but I keep

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1148705192298418222006-05-26T21:30:00.000-07:002006-05-26T22:16:27.586-07:00

I heard a lady explaining to her companion her approach to the subjects of the Dixie Chicks and the "Da Vinci Code"."You better know how the other person feels before you voice your opinion unless you have time to waste getting a headache."Not being particularly politically minded and with a only vague sense of spiritual matters, my thoughts on either subject are considered inconsequential by

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1148226213724411712006-05-21T08:09:00.000-07:002006-05-21T08:51:15.516-07:00

3000 Miles Looking at the Ass of a Uhaul.Photo Log Part OneThank You, Please Blast ThruImpressive sky, isn't it? Wait till you see the next set of shots. (I haven't been satisfied with any of my blogging attempts this week, so maybe I'll stick with pictures for a while and be a little more consistent.)

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1147231327617768242006-05-09T20:15:00.000-07:002006-05-09T20:22:07.663-07:00

Location, Location, LocationI'm obsessed I tell ya, obsessed!Zillow - it's worse than IMDBAlmost.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1147093586215693132006-05-08T05:30:00.000-07:002006-05-08T07:35:30.786-07:00

The Word Association Version:Uhaul - small, yet very thirstyBoxes - there is no way I own this much crapFurniture - scratched, heavy, never againArmadillos - quickest way to reincarnationRats - one very big oneWindshield - covered in bees!Coolant - leakingGas - $1200Rest Areas - variedWeigh Stations - closedToyota - rocks (MPG indeed)Phone - wait, is that a dial tone?!Work - confusingLaptop -

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1144823902549686192006-04-11T23:31:00.000-07:002006-04-11T23:44:19.106-07:00

Thanks for all the advice guys.Things are starting to come together finally.Except for the whole packing business - that seems to be moving very slowly. You fall into the "but I might need that next week" way of thinking and it's all downhill from there. It'll be like all night cram sessions before finals, the final days of packing.Think H&R Block will let me deduct Vivarin next year?

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1144571079770910062006-04-09T01:09:00.000-07:002006-04-09T22:07:06.233-07:00

You guys are smart.You know things.(Is the flattery working here?)Time to share your knowledge.And if you don't know, feel free to ask someone who does, be it your coworkers, neighbors, parents, or favorite barista.* Have you ever shipped a vehicle? What company do you recommend?* Have you ever towed a vehicle behind a Uhaul?* What's the best way to protect your belongings (and possibly the car

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1144425721825372682006-04-07T08:32:00.000-07:002006-04-07T09:02:01.896-07:00

from an email:I woke up around 7:00 after a typically odd dream, this one involving Mrs. Garrett and CNN and a historical map of Florida showing where all the presidents were born. And yes I'm aware presidents are not grown in Florida. That's just where their brothers go to play grown up. I'm pretty sure I was in the CNN studios where Mrs. G was pretending to bomb the fictional birthplaces of the

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1143702690615585032006-03-29T22:41:00.000-08:002006-03-30T10:41:15.406-08:00

I'm not sure where the quote originated; Weight Watchers maybe. You've heard it before: Nothing Tastes As Good As Being Thin FeelsYeah, until a slice of White Chocolate Raspberry Cheesecake comes to the table. Or a box of Girl Scout Cookies. And those crack-glazed Krispy Kreme's.....Sorry. I'm back now.Unfortunately, that quote has never done it for me. Maybe if my Fairy Godmother would grant me

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1143177752115768022006-03-28T11:21:00.000-08:002006-03-28T11:23:46.960-08:00

A very awkward looking word, especially in all caps.In five weeks, my predictable little life will change in big, big ways. And not on my terms. That may be the biggest thing, the fact that I had minimal control over all this.And of course, since it all revolves around my work, I can't really be specific. It's like I'm losing my job, but not exactly. It will be the same, except for the people,

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1143441651763145332006-03-26T21:39:00.000-08:002006-03-26T23:43:38.653-08:00

If we don't stop personifying animals, I will be forced into vegetarianism. Then again, people talk to, feed and tend to their plants also..... There's no winning is there?Damn animated feature films.For those of you unfamiliar with California dairy commercials, check out the Happy Cows. I'll also miss the Jack-In-The-Box commercials, since Florida is sorely lacking in creepy children's toy food

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1143178580632079652006-03-23T21:25:00.000-08:002006-03-23T21:36:20.676-08:00

The holodeck is pretty cool. Better than the replicator or the phaser.However, it completely creeps me out when one of the characters ends a program and the room goes to it's basic grid pattern. There is no way in hell I'd stand in that room without a program running.Admit it, that room looks freaky when not in use. It could be it's representation of endless possibilities, but I'm going with

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1141794728429556152006-03-07T20:56:00.000-08:002006-03-07T21:12:08.463-08:00

The SneezeHe eats things so you don't have to.He eats things you'd never consider.I hope.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1141715923639955042006-03-06T23:12:00.000-08:002006-03-06T23:24:39.796-08:00

Yeah yeah yeah yeahMiami uh uhSouth Beach bringin the heat uhHaha can y’all feel thatCan y’all feel thatJig it out uhChorusParty in the city where the heat is onAll night on the beach till the break of dawnWelcome to MiamiBuenvenidos a MiamiBouncin in the club where the heat is onAll night on the beach till the break of dawnI’m goin to MiamiWelcome to MiamiHow exactly does one "Jig it out" anyway

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1141500798237456372006-03-04T11:03:00.000-08:002006-03-04T11:37:36.770-08:00

Sometimes, when I click on the link for my blog I have a few seconds of fear. There's this irrational expectation that someone will have defaced my blog in the night. Tagging it, spray painting inappropriate messages and lewd caricatures. Maybe just a virtual post-it note saying You Suck.I'm really waiting for the Condemned sign.Or a Notice of Eviction.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1140852999248565712006-02-24T23:20:00.000-08:002006-02-24T23:48:05.476-08:00

You know when you say/do something wrong, and immediately feel bad about it? Wish you could take it back? Feel like God is shaking his head and tsk-tsking right along with your grandma and Emily Post?So you beat yourself up about it for a while (or years, as I tend to) and hope no one finds out, especially the person(s) you wronged. Please don't let them find out! And in some cases you just hope

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1140334638995710992006-02-18T23:12:00.000-08:002006-02-19T19:33:45.713-08:00

To anyone who has emailed me in the past few weeks, my apologies. I love email, I'm just forgetful. Gmail should be my primary address.========================The first round of spring reviews is coming to an end on Monday, and since I was proclaimed the Queen of Procrastination this year, I've got about 36 hours to get them done. Oh the pressure that comes with the crown.========================

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1140091016195792132006-02-16T02:49:00.000-08:002006-02-16T11:58:48.273-08:00

It seems every family member over the age of 35 has a series of anecdotes to share. It's their way of imparting wisdom. My Aunt is very fond of teaching the lessons of 'be happy with who you are' and 'be careful what you wish for'."When I was younger, we visited with our Grandma a lot. I thought she was the greatest lady. She would tell stories, and play games with us, and was not afraid to say

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1139733975681811142006-02-12T00:32:00.000-08:002006-02-12T00:52:27.520-08:00

According to Entertainment Weekly's Shaw Report:Freckles are INScars are 5-MINUTES AGOBeauty Marks are OUTFinally! I am part of the "IN" crowd. And for something I always wished I could change about myself!Irony, second only to Sarcasm.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1139305925495196722006-02-07T01:36:00.000-08:002006-02-07T01:52:05.576-08:00

The voices in my head (some writers call them characters) have gone radio-silent, so now I'm focusing on the beeping. This beeping should not be confused with the buzzing, which I've decided is my brain's homebrewed white noise.I thought it was contagious. Even my coworkers can hear it, but they say it doesn't bother them, that they only hear it at work, usually near my desk. Or wherever else I'm

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1138911598309388022006-02-02T11:56:00.000-08:002006-02-02T12:19:58.350-08:00

Western Union stopped sending telegrams, and I never got one. Although I often associate the word telegram with bad news, even the singing ones. I blame Clue for that of course. Still, it would have been fun to get one.Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow. Since I live in Southern California that doesn't really concern me so much. That and the fact it's a groundhog predicting the weather, and

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1138865927423331532006-02-01T23:23:00.000-08:002006-02-01T23:38:47.456-08:00

I've developed a new ritual. I must listen to a certain song in my car before going in to work. My subconscious has gotten wussy on me; work is not that bad....Pink MartiniHang on Little TomatoThe sun has left and forgotten meIt’s dark, I cannot seeWhy does this rain pour downI’m gonna drownIn a seaOf deep confusionSomebody told me, I don’t know whoWhenever you are sad and blueAnd you’re feelin’

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1138688777645480382006-01-30T21:17:00.000-08:002006-01-30T23:28:51.276-08:00

My love affair with "Dancing With the Stars" has only grown stronger this season. Although I question their definition of a star. How many of these names were truly familiar to you before the season started:Lisa Rinna, George Hamilton, Giselle Fernandez, P Miller, Tia Carrere, Kenny Mayne, Tatum O'Neal, Stacy Keibler, Drew Lachey, and Jerry RiceI scored 5 1/2 out of a possible 10.Once they said

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1138512365674137052006-01-28T20:47:00.000-08:002006-01-28T21:26:05.710-08:00

I am not a big fan of birds. In Florida there are descendants of a swan who must live with the knowledge that their ancestor was a child molester. A 4-year-old should be able to enjoy a playdate by the lake without fearing for her Osh-Kosh behind.I'm over it now tho. Really.My grandmother is also afraid of birds, to such a degree that the offer of a trip to "go feed the ducks" makes her toss her

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1137713693711167392006-01-19T15:29:00.000-08:002006-01-22T21:22:29.606-08:00

I could write 'Pay Bills' in black Sharpie I think.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1137609011861611902006-01-18T09:50:00.000-08:002006-01-18T10:38:24.723-08:00

I'm sure I've told you before, but you need to go check out Jennifer Crusie.Her booksHer websiteHer blogAnd the blog she shares with Bob MayerThe book she has coming out in April was written with Bob, with alternating chapters. You get some character driven stuff, and some action/adventure mayhem, with love and man-eating alligators and plenty of snark.I looked at Bob when we walked in and said,

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1137538197870350572006-01-17T14:41:00.000-08:002006-01-18T11:45:55.516-08:00

Mike Smith, Las Vegas Sun, January 13th

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1137223071404579132006-01-13T23:09:00.000-08:002006-01-14T22:51:55.170-08:00

Cary Grant - be still my heart.I've discovered the classics.My God, if I could get my dialogue to ping-pong like that....

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1137053343941055902006-01-11T23:21:00.000-08:002006-01-12T00:10:56.110-08:00

In preparation for car buying I spent a few weeks pouring over my credit reports and FICO scores and all that fun stuff. I'm still waiting for my credit score to bypass my SAT verbal, because let's face, which one is more important once you're out of school?(I could turn this into a post about how numbers define us, but that wasn't my original intent. Hmm.... which way to go from here? Eh, I'm

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1136698127496138452006-01-07T21:14:00.000-08:002006-01-07T22:04:45.786-08:00

It was the tiniest bump, so subtle it took a few moments before I asked "Did someone just hit us?"The answer to that question? Yes. Yes, someone did hit my beautiful new car while I was stopped at a red light. Yes, someone in a dilapidated old Datsun work truck with a metal cage around the grille hit my car and left a dent.I cursed like a sailor and cried like a baby. It's tiny, barely noticeable

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1136617888979816882006-01-06T23:25:00.000-08:002006-01-06T23:11:28.980-08:00

Pandora.comIf you knew about this and didn't share, then we need to have a talk.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1136580982895955752006-01-06T17:38:00.000-08:002006-01-06T23:05:29.793-08:00

"Think of it this way: You are 'a rat' to separate. There's a rat in separate, not an e rat. So one who separates is a rat."I'm pretty sure my English teacher in junior high had some unresolved divorce issues.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1136579040837835582006-01-06T12:22:00.000-08:002006-01-06T12:52:11.626-08:00

Is it just me, or does John Williams deserve some time off?Not that I'm complaining, I do enjoy a movie scored by him, I just feel bad for the guy. Luckily a lot of these were pieces from the movie score, otherwise I think Steven Spielberg should be ashamed of himself. Lucas too.Munich (2005)Memoirs of a Geisha (2005)Designing the Enemy: Tripods and Aliens (2005) (V)The H.G. Wells Legacy (2005)

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1136404329059835532006-01-04T11:42:00.000-08:002006-01-04T11:52:09.100-08:00

I am a negligent blogger. An absentee blogger.That's what happens when you spend several hours each night doing research for car buying. I think it paid off, because I am the owner of a brand new Toyota Corolla! I'm still slightly nauseous from the whole buying experience, but she is beautiful, and safe - I've got so many airbags they may have put one in the trunk.So, with a long list of blogging

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1135748433747882812005-12-27T21:13:00.000-08:002006-01-04T11:41:49.500-08:00

Clearly you are overdue for a nap when your eyes start doing a dead-fish-floating thing to the back of your head. And yet, here I am. I enjoy myself a good sleep, I just don't like going to bed. I may hem and haw and stall every which way to get out of it, but once I'm there, I don't want to leave. Hmm, I may be that way about a lot of things.Remember when you were younger, the day after

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1135364509477189592005-12-23T10:53:00.000-08:002005-12-23T11:01:49.516-08:00

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!0 dollars in wallet.1 gift left to buy.2 days to go.15-18 working hours per day.1200 milligrams of Advil.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1135230515977422742005-12-21T21:31:00.000-08:002005-12-21T21:51:31.343-08:00

Hmph.While I enjoy receiving, and I really do, if I had to choose, I'd rather give than receive. I'm just that kind of girl. A pleaser, if you will. I like to make people happy.(Gift giving and receiving.... although I guess that could be a gift. Do they have gift cards for that? I'm sure they do.)So I gave my entire staff gift bags of candy and Christmas cards thanking them for their hard work.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1135057469482673972005-12-19T21:45:00.000-08:002005-12-19T22:13:51.816-08:00

Twice last week I woke up singing "The Most Wonderful Day of the Year" in my head. Or rather, the first two lines of the song:We're on the Island of Misfit Toys. Here we don't want to stay.And playing in cinematic glory are images from a movie I've yet to see: The Island, with Scarlett Johansson and Ewan McGregor.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133513443223537742005-12-19T20:51:00.000-08:002005-12-19T22:17:21.540-08:00

Despite the fact that holiday music has been inescapable for nearly a month, there are some songs which manage not to give me a nervous eye twitch:Santa BabySleigh RideWinter WonderlandOh Come All Ye FaithfulCarol of the BellsAll I Want For ChristmasChristmas WaltzChristmas Wrapping Christmas Eve/Sarajevo 12/24Fond memories of singing in the school chorus or marching in parades. Well, fond may be

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1134769907822767412005-12-16T13:50:00.000-08:002005-12-16T13:51:47.903-08:00

Did I say I'd have a day off this week?My mistake.Maybe next week.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1134550760298629682005-12-14T00:37:00.000-08:002005-12-14T00:59:20.343-08:00

You might be asking yourself: Why would she take her car back to a mechanic who is proving unreliable and possibly criminal?It's a bad case of Force of Habit. That, mixed with sleep deprivation and stress, and I just go for what's the norm. I would say I'm a goober, but this probably qualifies as dumbass.After a worry-filled night, the car is back thanks to Bob*, complete with a new vacuum hose

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1134441218833937072005-12-12T18:23:00.000-08:002005-12-12T18:39:10.626-08:00

My mechanic is a very good mechanic. He came well recommended by a co-worker, whose very picky husband has been taking their cars there for years. I too have been taking my car there for years, approximately three.My mechanic has a very busy shop, and not a lot of space, so getting your car in can be troublesome, as are his Monday-Friday, 8 am-ish to 5 pm-on-the-dot hours.My mechanic recently got

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1134367618817058772005-12-11T21:46:00.000-08:002005-12-11T22:11:19.030-08:00

Dear Co-Workers - When I said to drink your Orange Juice and take your vitamins, I meant it. Working 15 hours a day thanks to your illness does not make me a Happy Santa. And since I'm your boss, that makes you one hell of an Unhappy Elf upon your return.(And please, I'm not cold and heartless, everyone gets sick, but when two people are out for a week, and someone ups and decides NOW is a good

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1134160852746469552005-12-09T12:34:00.000-08:002005-12-09T12:40:52.776-08:00

Ah, horoscopes. So vague, so easily applied:It may feel as if your progress at work has come to a stop, like a frozen moment on a movie screen. You now have a chance to explore the circumstances in your life that have reached their limit. Change is just around the corner, but this need not be frightening. Instead, take a deep breath and consciously decide what you want to do next.Maybe I should

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133936656809504162005-12-06T22:23:00.000-08:002005-12-08T03:02:19.703-08:00

What Do These People Do For A Living?!

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133936378595107682005-12-06T22:12:00.000-08:002005-12-06T22:19:38.630-08:00

I just wrote an entire post whining about the funk I am in and realized, if I don't even want to read it, why would you?As long as it doesn't go on too much longer, I'm going to chalk it up to the time of year, and move forward.Maybe I'll even write an acceptable post now and then.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133690609108967512005-12-04T01:45:00.000-08:002005-12-04T02:05:46.863-08:00

The scene takes place at the mall. Two shoppers need a quick pick-me-up.Shopper #1 - "Where's a good place to get a Coke?"Shopper #2 - "Well let's see, we're near the food court. Napoli Pizza is ok, a little flat. DQ/Orange Julius is too sweet. McDonald's has the best syrup to carbonation ratio, but Chik-fil-A is a better deal. No matter how thirsty you are, don't waste your money on a drink

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133511392573318272005-12-01T23:51:00.000-08:002005-12-02T00:16:32.606-08:00

I've been trying for over half an hour to type up a little introduction for one of my favorite poets. I give up. Type Billy Collins into Google and enjoy. I heard him speak a few years ago, and fell in literary love. Here's a sample:The CountryI wondered about youwhen you told me never to leavea box of wooden, strike-anywhere matcheslying around the house because the micemight get into them and

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1133310885553450292005-11-29T16:26:00.000-08:002005-11-29T17:05:27.916-08:00

You are cordially invited to My Pity Party!Come console, I mean celebrate with me as I play key pity-inducing moments of the past week over and over again in a loop.Since this is a theme party, please consider the following:* Pajamas are required* Copious amounts of chocolate and pizza must be consumed* Alcohol is a plusOnce the 4 stages of Pity (denial, anger, bingeing and locking the memories

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1132895372996998992005-11-24T20:42:00.000-08:002005-11-24T21:09:33.026-08:00

3000 miles away from family = Casual Turkey DayNot that we ever dressed up in our Sunday best, but the family gathering on Thanksgiving at least insured we all combed our hair and put on shoes and socks. I cannot tell a lie - the only shoes I put on today were fuzzy mauve slippers.And as for Thanksgiving Dinner.... how about Thanksgiving Brunch?After the discovery of the Reynold's Oven Bag,

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1132555760953976372005-11-20T22:46:00.000-08:002005-11-20T22:49:20.993-08:00

You should see all the posts in draft right now! I mean WOW.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1132133215351121912005-11-16T01:16:00.000-08:002005-11-16T01:26:55.380-08:00

All I can think about is work right now, which leads to much whining, which in turn leads to what few readers I have left deleting me from their "blogs-to-read" list. So no posts about paperwork and 17 hour days. But I do have this:Her: You should have My Daddy Got Out Of Prison Day.Me: We could pass out cute mini license plates to the kids.Her: Is there an at-home decorating kit for that yet?Me:

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1132030454018035532005-11-14T21:36:00.000-08:002005-11-14T21:42:17.513-08:00

There are all kinds of sexy. Either that, or I've got a skewed sense of what's hot. These are all actors; I'd probably need another list for authors and singers. I think my choices were frequently influenced by the characters these men portrayed....a - arnold vosloob - gabriel byrnec - bradley cooperd - james dentone - ewan mcgregorf - colin firthg - greg grunbergh - evan handleri - jeremy ironsj

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1132029991344914772005-11-14T18:45:00.000-08:002005-11-14T20:46:31.380-08:00

I fibbed.One long list of sexiness coming up!(Promise)

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1131781942672064542005-11-11T23:43:00.000-08:002005-11-11T23:52:22.726-08:00

Thanks for tagging me, therefore giving me something to blog about this weekend that doesn't require much thought, just a lot of suggestive eyebrow wiggling and tongue lolling.(Oh, you thought I was going to throw that list up right now? Sorry, I'm saving it for tomorrow night's paperwork break. Tonight I read blogs, tomorrow I post a long list of sexiness.)

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1131516832564921732005-11-08T21:59:00.000-08:002005-11-08T22:21:28.590-08:00

I'm trying something new: Going to bed at a reasonable hour.Yeah, it hurts just to say it. And while I'd like to believe that the full 8+ hours of sleep puts me in a better frame of mind and body the next day, I fear I'm confusing my system, which only gets that much rest on days off. Working 11 hours while your mind thinks you should be home all comfy in your jammie pants watching a Gilmore

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130292440053130062005-11-06T20:51:00.000-08:002005-11-06T20:52:44.936-08:00

My car's name is Bessie.She's green and cute and has a sensible number of doors - 4And as of October 28th she is MINE ALL MINE!That's right, I OWN that car. I have paid her off. No longer will a monthly car payment suck up precious fundage from my checking account. Until I decide to get a new one of course. I picked her out myself, signed the papers myself and upon that final payment, became an

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1131143349547822622005-11-05T23:26:00.000-08:002005-11-06T00:04:39.396-08:00

Grew up on Wonder? Love carbs? Hate the word wheat?Sara Lee Soft & Smooth Whole Grain White Bread is a very yummy compromise. (Yes, it takes a gimmick to make me eat wheat. Now if someone would do the "airplane" ploy with some broccoli I'll be all set.)

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130991793992132282005-11-02T20:18:00.000-08:002005-11-02T20:58:19.803-08:00

It is no coincidence that fast food comes in brown paper bags, like the porn of old. Don't let those happy white bags from McDonald's fool you; what's inside is still sinful, and might even make you go blind.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130826455206573662005-10-31T22:23:00.000-08:002005-10-31T22:53:22.746-08:00

To: MeFrom: MamaHoney, I hate to have to tell you this, but I think your mother is a sick woman. She spends her free time reading about wizards and dark magic, listening to a sociopathic serial killer while driving her car, and watching TV shows about killers, scientists who study them, people stranded on a strange and mysterious island, and a woman who sees dead people. I think I need serious

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130561439243955522005-10-28T21:50:00.000-07:002005-10-28T21:56:50.483-07:00

My life would be so much easier if I could just make myself eat salad.Damn - that's a lot of jelly.Damn - that's a big bottle of water. (1.5L baby)I should really start commenting on blogs, so people know I've stopped by. But you guys all have StatCounter or something I'm sure. You know I visited right? Yeah, I bet you do. And how long I stayed, my IP Address and browser. Don't judge me!I am SO

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129871342969016842005-10-25T19:02:00.000-07:002005-10-25T19:04:24.330-07:00

Dear iTunes,Please be advised my paycheck is being directly deposited into one of your off-shore accounts. I've realized my .99 goes farther when put towards downloading songs, as opposed to, say, rent. I would also like to say thank you for helping me achieve my dieting goals. By purchasing cardio-friendly songs I not only work up a sweat, I simply do not have the money to buy food. Keep up the

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130122954447676302005-10-23T19:44:00.000-07:002005-10-23T20:14:52.790-07:00

"I really can't decide which shoes.""Wear one of each and get his opinion. Tell him you have the match in the car.""I don't think hopping around the parking lot trying to buckle the little sandal strap is a good first impression.""Black sandals or black sandals, either way I don't think it's going to make that much difference.""It really is all about the shoes tho. The shoes decide if this outfit

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1130055879826715222005-10-23T01:20:00.000-07:002005-10-23T03:19:45.213-07:00

Make it stop.I know it's important and necessary. And I appreciate the production quality, I really do. This is way better than some in-class film strip and booklet session. But damn.Sexual Harassment Training late on a Saturday night.Oh yeah baby, I can show you a good time.Oh wait, I don't think that was appropriate.Good thing I'm not your supervisor.Can I go to bed now?

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129787064533103252005-10-19T21:54:00.000-07:002005-10-19T22:50:02.620-07:00

My sister has lost 65 pounds.Impressive for anybody, but since she's my sister I get to be extra proud. And jealous. I knew there was a reason she hadn't sent me a picture in months; shock value.Okay missy, two can play this game. I may not want to lose 65 lbs, but I can change too! My competitive streak would have it no other way. After visiting earlier this month, I came home feeling energized

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129526563217643552005-10-17T19:57:00.000-07:002005-10-17T19:58:00.480-07:00

"Steeple"Proud patriarch piercingThe pious panoply ofPeace-less purgatory

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129435447312997712005-10-15T21:44:00.000-07:002005-10-15T21:48:17.710-07:00

One "Sex as a Diet Aid" post coming up!(Please allow 2-3 working days for arrival, thank you.)On a (hopefully) unrelated topic: ThermaCare HeatwrapsApparently I'm getting old. I've had a rather persistent and annoying pain in my left hip/fanny region the past few days. I call it Work. A sudden increase in stress and manual labor has made me achy and ancient feeling.These wraps are kinda like

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129357114683170452005-10-14T23:10:00.000-07:002005-10-14T23:18:34.696-07:00

Lots of men feeling frisky tonight apparently:I'd hit it, but I wouldn't keep it.I wouldn't kick her out of bed.Quick, I need a pickup line.No really, overheard all these in one evening.And from the ladies:Damn it. Don't you dare come over here.Is he looking at me or you? Forget it, we'll share.Starbucks on a Friday night. Who knew?

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129186760137632532005-10-12T23:55:00.000-07:002005-10-14T00:52:43.693-07:00

I received a request to "write a real post for a change" .Apparently I've been pretty stingy with the word count lately, posting mere snippets of thought. So I've started several longer posts. (started being the key word)Which one should I finish first:A.S.S. SyndromeSex as Diet AidDDR at Best BuyBeauty and Exercise Contract with SatanSexual Harassment Training - Or, you mean I shouldn't do that?

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129186064513475152005-10-12T23:40:00.000-07:002005-10-12T23:55:22.490-07:00

Honestly, and I'm a little ashamed to say this, but whenever I can't sleep, and it's been hours since I turned out the light and I'm still trying, I simply have to start saying my prayers and I'm so out.I'm hoping it's because I get a sense of peace, not because I get bored. I do tend to go off topic A LOT. Stream of consciousness praying, how very Virginia Woolf of me.I actually apologize ahead

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129097788977440122005-10-11T22:45:00.000-07:002005-10-11T23:52:03.553-07:00

Who knew something could be too basic? A full-on after-church worthy Sunday dinner, easy as pie. Grilled cheese? Half a loaf of bread wasted in the trash.Of course that burning smell could be from the candles on my sister's birthday cake. She turned 30 today, a milestone that bothers my mother far more than my sister. Too bad I couldn't be there, I owe her a round of

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1129014605240991022005-10-10T23:51:00.000-07:002005-10-11T00:30:59.493-07:00

I was considering taking this lapse in posting as an opportunity to really slack off, but then I got some emails which actually made me feel guilty (and missed!). So I fiddled around for a while, fixed some things, even practiced putting up pictures. I plan to be back on a semi-regular posting schedule again this week.Thanks for being patient!Oh, and those baby blues up there belong to Riggs, a

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1128527075298958142005-10-05T08:32:00.000-07:002005-10-05T08:44:35.313-07:00

I can't blame just the 56k modem. Clearly this computer was a prop on the Flintstones. Signing in to blogger took over 4 minutes, what made me think playing with the template was a good idea? As soon as I get back from the land that time forgot, I'll fix her up again. Excuse the mess, thanks.

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1128335428914240392005-10-03T03:14:00.000-07:002005-10-03T03:30:28.936-07:00

If only there wasn't this fear of being fired, I could tell you all about my conference this week. The wine, famous people, numb asses, posh hotel room, wine, speeches, frou-frou food, men in suits, meetings, Power Point presentations, laughing, dancing, and did I mention the wine?And unlike the unfortunate Conventioneers mentioned below, I do not have anyone wishing I'd transfer out of state. (

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1127803896943015412005-09-26T23:47:00.000-07:002005-09-26T23:51:36.956-07:00

I would say "Leaving on a Jet Plane" except they screwed up my ticket and I have no idea what I'm flying on now. I'll know soon enough - I have to leave for the airport at 5:00 am.In the meantime....."Conventioneers"Barenaked LadiesYou walked into the roomAnd the whole place stopped to noticeStanding next to you, I feel hopeless and you know thisI've never been ashamed of my attractionI'd be

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1127546040656300132005-09-23T23:42:00.000-07:002005-09-24T00:14:00.676-07:00

#1 - DO NOT purchase, or drink, any Jones Soda Co. Halloween novelty beverages from Target. Just don't. Oh, they sound quirky and tasty, sure: Candy Corn, Strawberry S'lime, Caramel Apple, Scary Berry Lemonade. But unless you have run out of vomit-inducing medicines in the house and need to rid your body of harmful chemicals, don't add this to the mix.#2 - Children can sense things quicker

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1126505522637321792005-09-21T23:11:00.000-07:002005-09-22T00:52:10.280-07:00

And that's it.That's all there was saved in draft, just the title.I'm pretty sure it had nothing to do with actual smoking; possibly chocolate, but that's not too good either, what with the caloric intake and all. Chocolate is only good for you when you eat the expensive, decadent, dark variety in itsy-bitsy amounts. I grew up on Hershey's; not a lot of redemption value in those nutritional

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1127282233467022152005-09-20T22:31:00.000-07:002005-09-20T22:57:13.490-07:00

Somebody play Taps.The classic black dress shirt has died.My closet, once full of somber, respectable business attire, is now mocking me in shades of fuchsia, mauve, topaz and lime. I may be heading to the (other) land of palm trees and ocean breezes, but do I need to do so resembling a girlie frozen concoction?2 hours of concentrated searching earned me not a single long sleeve, button up,

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1127191763794972032005-09-19T21:10:00.000-07:002005-09-20T07:38:11.663-07:00

Oh I know, he takes himself way too seriously, that Don Henley. But match him up with Glenn Frey and the rest of the boys, and I can forgive him. I nearly wear out the 'back' button on my cd player, listening to the intro of Life In The Fast Lane over and over and over.While at work today, I had Wasted Time on a loop. I know the song well; every word, pause and change in inflection. But like many

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11571177.post-1127110990694533092005-09-18T22:27:00.000-07:002005-09-19T07:32:19.110-07:00

Too catchy a title to ignore, I picked up a copy of Why Do Men Have Nipples? this weekend.The information is delivered in that special snarky way that touches my heart. There's some email/chat transcripts between the authors, anecdotes and jokes thrown in for fun.A stellar example would be from the chapter All You (N)ever Wanted to Know About Sex, where a pair of sports announcers give a

Vicarious Livinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14228740179458203496noreply@blogger.com9